As a mothers, the postponement is too familiar to most of us. This is because we often have a list of things that we would rather not do! Stack of laundry or dishes, homework, exercise and handling of finances are common tasks that we hesitate. Add the attraction of a smartphone and it is easy to suddenly be away from the route. (I’m too guilty!)
But the truth is, we also hesitate things we have Do I want to do it how to start a company, to write a book, to take on a positive habit, etc.
Setting up is not as easy as no things want to do that we don’t want to do – it goes much deeper. In this post I will explain why you really hesitate (and what you can do).
Why do we hesitate?
In contrast to what many people believe, it is not about being lazy on hesitation. In the past, I believed that something just didn’t want to do anything on the gambling. And that makes sense. The things we most often reduce are boring tasks such as laundry or difficult tasks such as writing a college paper.
Research released in 2000 indicate a list of 7 trigger that cause hesitation:
- Boring
- Frustrating
- Difficult
- Ambiguous
- Unstructured
- Non -intrinsically worthwhile
- Lack of personal meaning
These triggers seem to make sense. At the same time, I can name many tasks that I do not hesitate to fall under the same trigger categories. And what about the tasks that we really want to do (how finally the book finally write), but we keep opening it (and instead you scroll through social media instead)? We have to look a little deeper. What I discovered was that the deletion is much more associated with an inner conflict.
The fear of failure, the fear of success and the unworthy of success are all inner conflicts that you can get to do what you should (or want to do!).
The reason why these inner conflicts cause postponement is that our subconscious always tries to protect us from damage (real or perceived). Defense is a way to do this. If a task is a situation that could be “dangerous” according to the subconscious, it will prevent it from continuing. Everything that is uncomfortable is perceived as a danger in the subconscious.
Inner conflicts that cause postponement
According to one of Dr. Susan Krauss Whitbourne wrote articles Today there are four inner inner conflicts that cause postponement:
Self -treatment
Here a person creates a situation that guarantees that they are unable to have success. This usually happens unconsciously. For example, someone who is afraid of failure will write off the writing of his book and then he will have the time more. The reason not to write, then a lack of time that is easier to handle than with a lack of skills or fear of success.
Tipping is a method that really helped me to overcome hand handles myself.
Low self -efficacy
Another inner conflict is a low self -efficacy. Similar to self -confidence, self -efficacy is self -confidence for a specific task. For example, you may have a lot of confidence in your ability to bake a cake, but very low in your ability to grow a tomato.
If you don’t believe that you can do something, you could try to try. This is not just afraid of failure. With low self -efficacy, it is also about stress that is caused while trying to do a task that you do not believe that you are able. Your subconscious also wants to avoid this stress.
Find thrill
For some people, the pressure of a close period can give them a thrill. Studies suggest that this is typical of extroverted.
perfectionism
Perfectionism is the fourth cause of the postponement. Whitbourne argues that some people are so afraid of imperfection that they can do a task like writing a paper, but entering them.
However, some examinations suggest that perfectionism is actually a symptom of low self -esteem. A 2011 study showed that at least a certain perfectionism is the product of low self -esteem and self -criticism.
How to overcome the delay (and become a productivity machine)
If you tend to hesitate and finally want to stop, find some tips here that can help:
Recognize hesitation
The first thing you have to do can be seen when you hesitate. This can be difficult to recognize, especially if the task you use to distract yourself is also something that needs to be done (e.g. cleaning). It is easy to make the excuse that cleaning has a priority.
As mentioned above, perfectionism is a different option, as people hesitate. If you end something because you don’t believe that it is still good enough, you may be able to hesitate.
If you create obstacles to yourself, you can also hesitate. For example, if you spend $ 1,000 for clothing instead of the new computer, you have to write your book, you sabotage yourself.
Find out the underlying cause
As soon as you realize that you hesitate, you can start digging deeper and finding out what the underlying cause is. Here are some options:
- Fear of failure
- Fear of success
- feel unworthy
- feel guilty
If you find out the problem with the way of thinking that causes your postponement, you can start the task again.
Increasing is often a thinking problem, but sometimes it is more about the task itself. Do you hesitate to do something because it is really nothing you should do?
We all hesitate at certain times how to remove the laundry or pay an invoice. But these things are usually done at some point because we see the benefits of them. If I don’t dash out of laundry, my life makes it much more difficult!
If there is a task or a goal that you deter you indefinitely, this goal may not be part of your life, and that must also be considered.
Forgive you
The research published in 2010 discovered that the awarding of forgives can help for earlier hesitation to reduce future postponement. If you are guilty or ashamed in the past that you have been in time in the past in the past to let go so that you can make a real change.
Use productivity hacks
As soon as you uncover problems with thinking that cause your postponement, you can use productivity hacks to get the task and achieve your goals.
Break big tasks into small pieces
If you hesitate due to overwhelming hesitation, it is a great way to disassemble your tasks into manageable pieces in order to be productive. I like to start with my goal and then find out what needs to be done before reaching the goal, which has to be done before this task, etc.
Prioritize
If my to-do list gets out of control, I would like to avoid it completely! But when I spend 10-15 minutes in the morning to prioritize what he has to do, I feel a lot more control. I even feel more capable! I choose 3 main tasks that have to be finished, and everything else I can do is a bonus. Time management can also affect self -confidence. Therefore, it is a great help to get control of it.
Eat the frog
Brian Tracys Book Eat this frog Teaches a lot of productivity hacks, but most importantly to eat a frog every morning. He says that if you have to eat a frog every day, make it in the morning and the rest of your day will be easy.
He (of course) does not mean eating frogs. Instead, he refers to these important tasks that are boring, frustrating, difficult, etc. That day it was a successful day.
Use the 5 -second rule
If the eating of the frog is too difficult, try the following: the 5 -second rule. Mel Robbins, author of The 5 -second ruleexplains: “If you have an impulse to react to a goal, you will have to move physically within 5 seconds, otherwise your brain will kill the idea.” It recommends that you take off-5-4-3-2-1 go and then to every measure you have to carry out (even if it is small).
Use the 80/20 rule
This is my personal favorite.
Taking independent tasks is a form of hesitation. Stick to 20 percent of the tasks that give you 80 percent of your rewards. For example, meal planning or the time to ensure that the children hardly use clothes (instead of throwing them in the laundry), in order to save a lot of fight later.
Receive accountability
Having someone besides themselves who is responsible is a great way to stay with the task. Ask a friend or colleague to have a weekly or monthly check-in your progress. This always helps me because I hate to disappoint someone else or admit that I have not done what I said.
Use the Pomodoro method
This method comes from Francesco Cirillo and his tomato kitchens. The Pomodoro method is simple:
- Set a timer for 25 minutes and work on your task
- Then set the timer for 5 or 10 minutes and take a break
- Repeat the cycle for 4 pomodoros and then take a longer break. 15-30 minutes.
This technique gives a little time to do work and also promises the reward of a break. If 25 minutes are too long, choose a time that works for you. You can increase the time at any time if you get used to the system.
Concentrate
Zaudderers usually focus on the short -term advantages of a task. If you find that you hesitate, you remember the long -term advantages like more money, a clean home to graduate, a quieter household, etc.
You take care
Make sure you have enough quality and eat healthy food to fuel your brain and give yourself the best chance to achieve your goals.
Overcome the deflection: is it possible?
Sometimes postponement can feel like it has taken over and they have no control. But there are many things you can do to beat the postponement and achieve your goals. Always rate the underlying cause first. No productivity hacks help you until you find the source of self -sabotage and use some of these strategies to get ahead!
This article was medically by Dr. Lauren Jefferis, the board certificate certified in internal medicine and pediatrics. As always, this is not a personal medical advice and we recommend that you speak to your doctor or to work with a doctor at Steadymd.
Are you a postponement? With what cause do you identify the most?